3 Steps To Go From Fear to Freedom

How do you know if a Fear is real or fake? It can sometimes be very difficult to tell the difference!

According to the American Psychological Association, 95% of people do not take action on their dreams because of fear.  And – 98% of the fear is unfounded.

At Create Your Life!, we call this a Fauxbia. … “f-a-u-x-b-i-a”.

Faux meaning “fake”… a “fake fear”.fear

Did you know that fake fears … or unfounded fears … are what prevent 98% of the 95% of people who do not move their dreams into action?

That means that the beliefs that are holding you back – the ones that are generating that fear – are made up!  But rather than change or question these Beliefs (which, by the way, are just thoughts that have been thought over and over again), what’s commonly done instead is finding all kinds of practical, rational, reasons not to act.

In other words, we use our rationality as a way to then support our limiting beliefs.

See yourself in any of this? According to the stats, the likelihood is YES!

And it’s a domino effect from there – inaction creates symptoms like procrastination, avoidance, missing that meeting or phone call, not following through on an assignment, rationalizing why things are good enough, or why the timing is wrong, or being immobilized by perfectionism, or thinking things through to the point of “analysis paralysis”.  All of these responses are forms of fear’s resistance and they’re also the breeding ground for feelings of frustration, anger, anxiety, loneliness, feeling stuck, victimized, in a place of lack, envious of others… Yuck.

Here’s an alternative to all that…

The key to being bigger than your fear is learning how to integrate it – and ideally even welcome it. This learning process is profoundly empowering and it’s a life-long practice.

Believe it or not, fear can be your friend. Rather than being afraid of your fear, what if you were curious about it instead?  Truth is that fear, if welcomed, can propel you forward. It can inspire you to consistently expand beyond those old out-dated beliefs about what you’re really capable of.

To s-t-r-e-t-c-h beyond fear, takes courage!  It helps to remember that brave people are NOT without fear. If they were, what in the world would they need bravery for?!?

Fear can be managed and it can be minimized, but it’s not going to disappear altogether. Your dreams and goals are inviting you to step into BEING a bolder, braver, more expansive version of yourself.

The more you shy away from your fear, the more power and influence fear will have over YOU. So, rather than investing your precious energy in fruitless efforts to hide from your fears, pretend they’re not there, or wish them away, why not invite Fear in for a cup of tea. (Camomile, perhaps?)

3 Steps to Go From Fear to Freedom:

The following 3-step process is an adaptation of a technique that, in psychological circles, is known as “flooding.”  It is very effective in treating even the most severe phobias  – or, in this case, “fauxbias”.  🙂

Done in full, this is a foolproof way to s-t-r-e-t-c-h beyond your fears and take action on even your most daring dreams.

You’ll need: pen, paper, and a willingness to write it out.

1. Get Specific About Your Fear

Before you can stretch beyond your fear, you must know what IT is! Do you know what you’re afraid OF?

Finding the vocabulary to name your fear is a courageous step all its own. Until you bring your awareness to what you are afraid of, that vague yet immobilizing fear will be in your driver’s seat. By naming your fear, you reconnect to your power, because now you see what’s in your way.

On a blank page, ask yourself, “What might happen if I really go for my dream (in that full-blown leap of faith kind of way)?” “What is the worst-case scenario?” and write out your answers in full. Give your fears an uncensored voice, getting it all out on the page. While this may seem like an enormous undertaking, and of course it takes as long as it takes, I’d honestly be surprised if you spend more than 30 minutes on this.

2. Read It Aloud

When you’re done writing, read it out loud, without interruption, ideally to someone you trust.  Once you’ve finished, have the person listening ask you, “Are you ready to take action, despite your fears?” Tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!

If your answer is anything but a full-fledged “Yes!” then read it again, the whole thing. And again. And again. As many times as it takes, each time answering the question at the end: “Are you ready to take action, despite your fears?

3. Take Aligned Action

leap and the net will appear

Once you’ve determined that, yes, you are indeed ready to take action, despite your fears, then identify one or two clear, challenging-but-doable next steps that you WILL take to move in the direction of your dreams.

There’s no longer any reason to stay stuck. This 3-part exercise will get you unstuck, helping you move from a place of fear and doubt, into the clarity of awareness about WHAT you’re afraid of…and then back into aligned action.

BE courageous.  Take this no nonsense, simple, powerful, dream-propelling next step:

–> Submit your answers to my Dream Discovery Questions and receive a complimentary Dream Discovery session with Create Your Life! Founder & Dream Acceleration™ Master Coach, Tara Sage Steeves.

Your dreams will thank you!

First come, first served, so do respond right away before your fearful Inner Naysayer successfully talks you out of why you shouldn’t do this for yourself.

I can’t wait to connect!

What’s YOUR Superpower?

I had the unique opportunity to answer this question this week and, while it admittedly feels vulnerable as can be to share my from-the-gut unedited reply, I’ve decided to post it here – to share it – in hopes that it will inspire YOU to consider this question for yourself and share wonderwomanyour own reply in the comments below.

Here’s my quick answer:

I’m frickin’ fierce about “no limits” and am resourceful as hell. I always find/see “a way.” To me, it is vividly clear that the biggest hurdle to dream realization is not “the how,” but rather the blocks to expansive visioning and full-on what-do-you-REALLY-want dreaming.  I am an advocate and a freedom-fighter for closeted dreams and closeted creativity.  In an (admittedly over-dramatic) sense, I feel like my true client is the dream or the creativity itself, and that I coach the person so they can essentially get out of “our” way.

(Quick segue: A client of mine this week told me she took artwork out of her closet that had been in there for years and hung it on the walls all around her home. I was absolutely tickled — art literally came out of the closet!! Delighted doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt.)

So, yeah – I give Permission (with a capital P) for unrestricted imagination and personal freedom like nobody’s business.  I am hyper-creative with a flair for drama – obviously – and I absolutely lovelovelove few things more than to apply this creative energy to creating environments (both physical environments and virtual “containers”) that expand minds and give folks profound permission and complete freedom to dream and vision for their life beyond the limits of what they’ve ever allowed themselves to before — and then … to share it, let it be seen, have it feel real, and start to see that it IS possible.  I totally rock at this.    🙂

I have yet to have someone convince me that something is impossible.  And few try, because they quickly see it’s futile.  In short, I am the self-proclaimed Possibility Queen.  (And – yep, you bet I owe the domain www.thepossibilityqueen.com).

So what’s YOUR superpower?  What is a unique and natural ability – something you do – maybe even without trying?  Shine a light on it here. Join me in courageously letting it be seen.

May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Tara