Structure vs. Rigidity … + High Octane Fear

There was a time when I was *very* (an understatement) resistant to structure.

But now I L-O-V-E it. Here’s why:Unknown

As a creative, I understand in a visceral first-hand way, how the relationship with ‘structure’ can trigger some HIGH DRAMA and HIGH OCTANE FEAR …

Fear about being trapped, or locked in, 
fear about having to shrink to fit in it, 
fear about being limited by it, 
fear about creativity being stifled, 
fear that my Soul will be smothered… 
I seriously thought structure might be the death of me. 
If you feel any degree of this, trust me, I get it.

But I l-o-v-e it now because I came to understand a Key Distinction that really is so so important: Structure vs. Rigidity….

Structure is like a bowl, it holds the space. 
Structure, like your skeletal system, allows you to stand. 
Structure, like the foundation of a house, supports building a new level. 
*Structure SUPPORTS creativity.* (Big time.)

Yet all too often, rigidity and structure are mistaken for one another, despite the fact that they are worlds apart:

Rigidity prevents freedom.
Structure support it.
Rigidity prevents movement. 
Structure allows and supports it. 
Rigidity resists progress or change.
Structure supports it. 
Rigidity narrows options. 
Structure supports expansion, creation, and growth. 
Rigidity is soul-deadening.
Structure holds the space for an awakening to a new level of truth and possibilities…

Once I “got” this. I was able to create in my life on a whole new level. And I was also able to support my clients on a whole new level. I literally couldn’t have created a business that has sustained 11 years(!) and served 1000s, across 4+ continents…

It simply couldn’t have happened without a shift in my relationship with STRUCTURE.

Once I “got” this, one thing I was then able to create, straight from my heart, with uber-intentional design, was the Create Your Life! Dream Acceleration™ Program ( … it was built entirely on the STRUCTURE of my 9 step Dream Acceleration™ Process … and it’s what has allowed me to coach clients around the world to create awesome results, by providing them with just the right amount of “holding”, the laser-focused tools and support for a strong “foundation”, and the steady, step-by-step, action-oriented, accelerated, move-forward momentum that’s needed … all while “standing tall”.

I’d love to hear from YOU (yes, you): How do you feel about structure? How does structure support you? How could welcoming more structure support you in accelerated success in creating those things that you currently dream of?

How Deep Is Your Love?

Valentine’s day is here – a great time to deepen your love in a very personal and intimate relationship … the relationship you have with your dreams and desires.

There’s a big hairy misconception about dream realization that all too often undermines the health of this relationship, effectively sabotaging the fulfillment of your dreams and the creation of a life you L-O-V-E.  

This big hairy misconception is rooted in the False Belief that: 

“My relationship with my dreams begin later because … my dream isn’t here yet.”

To demonstrate this, hold in your mind something you really, really want – something that you have been dreaming of. It could be anything, so for right now, choose something to hold in your awareness.

Got it? Good. 

Now let’s talk relationships.

HeartIn your relationships with other people, you ideally want to feel cared for, loved, heard, respected, trusted, supported, appreciated and understood, right? Of course you do! Feeling these things in relationships feels gooood.

Ok. So now, I want you to imagine … switching places with your dream. (Yes, you read that right.) Imagine, being your dream in a relationship with YOU.

In other words, put yourself in your dream’s shoes and imagine what it might feel like to be a dream of yours in a relationship with YOU.

==> BE the book that hasn’t been written yet, or the painting that hasn’t been painted yet.

==> BE the business or offering that hasn’t been launched yet.

==> BE the fitness milestone or the travel adventure that hasn’t been lived yet.

==> BE the home that hasn’t been bought yet.  (You get the idea…)

Be it, and feel what it feels.  

Check in:

  • Does your dream feel loved and appreciated?
  • Does your dream feel nurtured and cared for?
  • Does your dream feel really tired of hearing why it won’t work or why it’s impossible or unrealistic? Or why it’s just not the right time? Or why it’s not big enough, or clear enough, or fancy enough to be given any real attention?
  • How does your dream feel about YOU?

(This exercise is not intended to make you feel bad, but to make a really important point and to raise your awareness about the fact that you are absolutely in a relationship with your dreams — right now.  And that it’s a relationship that always has room for more LOVE.)

Honesty can only serve you here: How would you describe your current relationship with your dream?

The clearer you get on your CURRENT relationship to your dream or dreams, the greater awareness you will have to take your relationship to the next level!  

So, for starters, rather than hide it, or keep it private, or in the shadows, treating it like a relationship with someone you’re not ready to hold hands with in public … why not share and declare your relationship status proudly!

Here are some ways to deepen your love today:

  • Talk nice both TO your dreams, and ABOUT your dreams.
  • Let your dream know how much you love and appreciate it.
  • Tell your dream that it can expect to receive regular attention from you from now on.
  • Share how important your dream is to you.
  • Be grateful for the ways your dream challenges and inspires you.
  • Remind your dream that you are absolutely in this together.
  • Assure your dream that you believe in, and even cherish, it.

This is a key topic that we explore at a much deeper level through the Create Your Life! Dream Acceleration™ Program, about deepening your relationships – to your dreams, to your energy, to your Dream Team … because it makes such a HUGE difference!

That said, while it can absolutely and understandably be intimidating to look at and embrace your dreams in a new way, know that you are on a beautiful, expansive, unfolding journey of limitless love and possibilities.  

So by showing up bravely, owning your part and consciously giving your relationship loving attention and the nourishment it needs to grow and evolve … you’ll see it blossom before your very eyes!

Are YOU ready to give your dream(s) some serious love? 

Show your dream some serious L-O-V-E by making a date with ME, your in-house Dream Acceleration Master Coach!  Transform your relationship with your dream for more abundance, well-being, fun, and freedom in your life. Show your dream how much it really means to you by making an appointment on its behalf.  

Get in right relationship with your dreams by answering our 6 Dream Igniting Questions and setting up a complimentary Dream Discovery tele-session. You are going to be amazed what can happen in just one session!  And it’s my GIFT to you.  🙂  

Do it for your dreams, especially the ones that you currently think are impossible.  They’ll thank you later.

This love relationship is ready and eager to show up for you, but YOU need to make the first move.

You’ve got this. 

From my heart to yours – big love,

Tara Sage Steeves

How to Make & KEEP Your Resolutions

A quick question for you… Looking back on this past year, was there a theme to the year for you? After doing my own Year-In-Review reflection, it became clear that ‘moving’ was definitely a theme. I’ve deemed it My Year of Movement.

  • I moved from Rhode Island to Virginia.
  • I “moved” into a new decade, turning 40 in July.
  • I “moved in the world” (what others might call exercise) on a regular basis, with salsa clubs becoming a second home.
  • I moved a lot of “stuff”, purging, streamlining, organizing, and getting rid of a significant amount of things that I no longer needed. (Streamlining my home and minimizing possessions is something I’ll be continuing to give focus to in the new year, but in 2015 I made significant strides in this area.)
  • And, this year, I’ve beendeeply moved …. living from my heart more than ever, trusting and honoring it’s wisdom with a new-level of confidence…

So, how about you? What theme captures the summation of the closing year for you? And: How will you allow this energy to support and propel your goals and dreams for the year ahead?

To support this, here are some key tips for how to make & keep your Resolutions in the coming year:

While statistics show that most people don’t stick to their New Year’s resolutions, you can beat the odds. Of course you can make resolutions for change any time of year, but the New Year brings a fresh new-start energy and momentum that invites change. Surf this wave!

Set Your Intentions Making a successful resolution begins with your frame of mind. How do you want this year to be different from last year? What changes would you like to see? What is your heart longing for more of, or less of? This isn’t a dress rehearsal – it’s your life. What do you really want to experience? Write it down. Then…

Activate the Power of Decision Be specific about what you are setting out to accomplish. *Getting clear on how you will know when you have fully achieved your intention or resolution is key to success.* Too often people sabotage their goals and dreams by being vague about what they are looking to create or achieve. Be specific at the start about what success will look like for you and you’ll know with clarity when it’s time to celebrate! Determining your end point at the start is a gift you give to yourself.

Answer “Why?” Before taking action on your resolution, get clear on what is at the heart of your motivation. Check in to be sure it’s not a “should” or something someone else wants for you. Why do YOU want this? By getting clear on your “why” at the start, in the event that you do get off track, you’ll be able to quickly reconnect to your resolution fuel. When supporting a client in creating a solid goal-setting plan, we walk through what I call The Create Your Life! Why Wonder Process™, which includes completing these 3 sentences to activate authentic motivation:

    1. This year I will _____________ because …
    2. When I successfully accomplish this, I will …
    3. If I give up or don’t follow through, I will …

Grab a journal and be as honest as possible in your replies.

Active the Power of Declaration This is about making a commitment. Once you’ve decided what your resolution is, say it out loud – to yourself and to other people. While we all have our lone ranger tendencies, the right support makes all the difference. By sharing your resolutions with others, you create accountability to stay on track so that you are successful this year.

“I have a dream” JOIN US! Be next to experience our renowned Dream Acceleration Program! Find all the details and reserve your seat here: Make this be your absolute best year yet!

May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Tara Sage Steeves

Top 10 “Top 10” Lists to Jump-Start 2016!

The new year is here, and the start of a new year is a fantastic time to do a personal inventory and set your sites on the future you’re going to be creating in these next 12 months, and beyond.

Yet so often the task can be daunting!

Here’s a fun way to jump-start YOUR year … by applying 3 Vital Year-In-Review Keys that Will Get You Ready to Rocket (& Rock It!) Forward for a New Year that Exceeds Your Expectations:

Vital Key #1. Highlight Reasons for Appreciation & Celebration

Do a Reflective Review of the Areas of Your Life

Review 2015 in your mind and heart and tune in to what’s been created – listing out as many things as come to mind. What are things that you have appreciation for? What are you proud of?

If you are getting a little stuck, consider different areas of your life one at a time. For example:

  • …what have you created in your life around your health?
  • …what about your professional life / business / career?
  • …how have your relationships improved or shifted?
  • …anything around money: spending, saving, understanding it?
  • …what have you created in your home / physical environment?

Celebrate Success

It might help as well to think of each month, or each season, reviewing one month at a time as a way to recall highlights and significant events that took place for you this year.

Celebrating and acknowledging your accomplishments is a critical part of successful dream realization!

Acknowledging your accomplishments creates confidence, and confidence in yourself breeds even more action, momentum and accomplishments.

What you are grateful for, you attract more of. List things you are grateful that you’ve accomplished, received, created or co-created as part of a team or group this year.

Create Your Top 10 “Top 10” Lists!

Top 10 lists are a quick glance on a range of topics from Hollywood’s best dressed, to current events, to travel destinations and ideas for consideration on personal growth. As 2015 comes to a close and 2016 kicks-off, it’s a great time to get out a notebook or journal and create your own Top 10 lists!

Use these Top 10 lists to remind yourself of what’s good and shining about you and your life. Use them to become more aware of what you know and what you can do to make the world a better place. Use them to reconnect with your dreams, to remember what you truly want. (This valuable information will come in handy for the next two steps.)

Top 10

  1. Top 10 Things I Love About My LIfe
  2. Top 10 Moments in 2015
  3. Top 10 Priorities for 2016
  4. Top 10 Ways I Spread Light in The World
  5. Top 10 Things That Are Uniquely “Me”
  6. Top 10 Books I Want to Read
  7. Top 10 Things I’d Like to Do Before I Die
  8. Top 10 Reasons for Gratitude in My Life
  9. Top 10 Things I Want to Learn
  10. Top 10 Activities That Make Me Feel Alive

Smile and be proud of each and every item on your list, really recognizing YOUR role in it! And to really “amp up” your energy, circle the top 3 things that you have accomplished/created/are really appreciative of from your 2015 Year-In-Review and top 3 priorities for 2016 – and find ways to share and celebrate them.

Vital Key #2. Acknowledge Unrealized Goals

Remember back to the start of 2015 and the intentions, dreams, and goals you had set for yourself. Make special note of any goals, resolutions, or dreams that you had for 2015 that have NOT yet come to fruition.

Here’s why this is so important: Just because you have some things that have not yet come to fruition, doesn’t mean you should forget about them or ignore them. The opposite is true.

There is such value to you in not sweeping them under the rug, or ignoring them. There is real value in acknowledging and shining a light on these things. It activates personal responsibility and accountability … AND this is super important and telling information that will help you get clear on your intentions and priorities for 2016!

Vital Key #3. Ignite Passion for Next Steps

What happens when you keep on churning in your mind, leaving no room for space, and no room for creativity and dreaming? What happens when you keep your nose to the grindstone, non-stop, and don’t come up for air? You burn out. You get lost in the day-to-day. You lose your sense of inspiration and fulfillment. And you miss the opportunities that come with tuning in to hear your inner wisdom and guidance.

As referred to in the ancient text, the Tao Te Ching, “We mold clay into a pot, but it is the emptiness in it that makes the pot useful.” This is an important metaphor. A clay pot is useful, not for its clay but for its emptiness.

Creating time and space, reflecting, releasing throughts, releasing “problem solving” and the mental check-list, can be a very productive thing to do. It supports you in imagining and creating your best year yet!

Once you have recalled a list of accomplishments for yourself this year, and have brought to light those things that haven’t been yet realized, you can then be clearer about your plans for 2016.

What's Next?

Questions to consider:

  • What’s your plan for 2016?
  • What are you committed to? Or perhaps RE-committed to?
  • What are you going to DO differently in 2016?
  • Who’s on your Dream Team?

Early Early Bird ends at MIDNIGHT TONIGHT!

There are a few sacred seats left in our renowned 8-week Dream Acceleration Program: starts January 18, Martin Luther King, Jr. “I have a dream” day!  Join us and just imagine where you’ll be by Spring!   For details and to reserve your seat:

Here’s to your best and brightest year yet!

May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Tara Sage Steeves

Your Year-in-Review: Part 3 is here!

Hey there!

To celebrate the excitement and potential of the new year that’s just around the corner, here’s part 3 of my very special Year-in-Review Video Series to support YOU and ensure that you have a truly Happy YOU Year:

And just in case you missed videos 1 & 2:

Watch video #1

Watch video #2

The Year in Review - Part 3

This 3-part Year in Review Video Series walks you through giving focus to the value of reflective time to get clear on:

    1. What you accomplished in 2015
    2. Dreams, goals, and resolutions on your list that didn’t actualize
    3. Your action plan for 2016

With this clarity, you’ll be ready to create 2016 to be your best year yet!

Take it even FURTHER – and take advantage of our super-affordable Early Early Bird special (good through MIDNIGHT on January 1!) …  Jump-start your New Year by claiming one of the few seats left in our 8-week Dream Acceleration Program!

It all starts January 18: Martin Luther King, Jr. day … an awesome day to join forces and bravely, boldly, uncover, activate, and accelerate YOUR deepest dreams and desires! 🙂  I can’t wait.

Find out more at:

May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Tara Sage Steeves

Your Year-in-Review: Part 2 (of 3)

Joy to you!

As you’re reflecting over this past year, notice: What goals or dreams did NOT come to fruition for you?

In this video, I cover why many dreams go unrealized and fall by the wayside.

It’s uber important not to ignore or disregard the fact that you did not achieve them. In fact, by shining light on them, you’ll gain the clarity and momentum you need to actualize what you really truly want in 2016.

If you’re truly ready for this year to be different, start the New Year with purpose and passion by joining myself and a team of creative and innovative dreamers-in-action for our very powerful 8-week dream-propelling journey that starts in January … Find out more at:

Part III of this special 3-part Year-in-Review video series will be on the way tomorrow. Part 3 really brings it all together – so be on the lookout for that tomorrow. 

In the mean time, enjoy!

May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Your Year-in-Review: Part 1 (of 3)

Happy (almost) New Year!

With the new year on the horizon, even despite the busy-ness of this time of year, it’s absolutely essential that you give yourself space to review these past 12-months. In part 1 of my 3-part Year-In-Review video coaching series, I share a quick easy way to do just that:

What’s something that YOU have a great appreciation for? Write down at least 3 things that you’re appreciative about and then stay tuned tomorrow for part 2 of this special 3-part series.

Get ready to realize YOUR biggest, boldest dreams in 2016!  


May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate,

Impossible?!? HA!

Celebrating the success of my clients is one of my most “favorite-est” things to do!!  🙂 Here are a few recent successes I can’t resist shouting from this virtual rooftop:

==> After just *one month* of private coaching together, an artist client of mine has gone from having 0 commissioned works on her docket, to EIGHT … and counting!! (At Create Your Life! we scoff at the “starving artist” construct.)

==> Another got her first new biz speaking opportunity, and turned it into 8 follow-up connections with prospects eager for her services. (Go girl!)

==> Another rolled up her sleeves and created dramatic transformation and order in her home office … and in the process has set herself up to breathe new life into an old business. (Magic in the making.)

==> Another released 36lbs over the last few months, and is doing more of what she loves: getting paid to play games. (Yep!)

==> Another (a single mom and business owner), has a solidly doable plan for 2016, that includes $240k in revenue *and* 2+ months of international leisure travel in the New Year.

…. Some would say these things are impossible. Ha!
Create Your Life! clients do the “impossible” on a regular basis.

Want to be the next Success Story?? Visit and claim a complimentary session, and together let’s explore the possibilities.

I can’t wait to serve YOU!

“Nice” vs. “Kind”: How These Words Can Change The Course of Your Life

I’ve always cringed at the word “nice”. Here’s why:

There’s a very important (and subtle) difference between being “nice” and being “kind” and the difference can really set you up for two VERY distinctly different life path trajectories.

My problem with “nice” is boiled down to the fact that the focus of “nice” is on people pleasing. See, “nice” is dependent on someone else to give you the “nice” stamp of approval. “She’s so nice.” “He’s a nice person.” Others must decide if you’re nice – or not nice.  And since a consensus is VERY unlikely … this can lead to a lifetime of falling short, never officially earning the “nice” stamp.

It’s so very Santa Claus.  It’s time to stop living for presents and avoiding coal, don’t you think?  Nice/not nice is a framework and a mindset that risks self-sacrifice, martyrdom, and always living for the approval of others in order to feel good about yourself and your choices.

be-kind“Kind”, on the other hand, is a character trait. You can claim it, intend it, practice it, adopt it. “Kindness” is an act, an extension of being kind. And, hey, someone can appreciate an act of kindness – or not. That’s up to them. But, either way, no consensus is needed for you to be kind.

The short of it is this:  “Kind” lives in the HEART, and “nice” lives in the MINDS OF OTHERS.

What do you think? Is there a difference between “nice’ and “kind”? If so, what is it and does it matter? Do you feel that one invites a different way of living than the other? How so? Are YOU kind? Are YOU nice? How do you know?